Tuesday, October 04, 2005

"If you don't care, then I don't care, we're not going anywhere..."

Good song! Very applicable right now.

Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby?
Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real
Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you?
Why'd you turn away?
Here's what I have to say:

I was left to cry there, waitin' outside there
Grinnin' with a lost stare
That's when I decided

Why should I care?
'Cause you weren't there when I was scared
I was so alone...
You, you need to listen!
I'm startin' to trip, I'm losin' my grip
And I'm in this thing alone...

Am I just some chick you placed beside you,
To take somebody's place?
When you turn around can you recognize... my face?
You used to love me, you used to hug me
But that wasn't the case,
Everything wasn't okay

Cryin' out loud
I'm cryin' out... loud
Cryin' out loud
I'm cryin' out... loud!

Open your... eyes!
Open up... wide!

Why should I care?
'Cause you weren't there when I was scared,
I was so alone...

Why should I care?
If you don't care, then I don't care,
We're not goin' anywhere!

(Avril Lavigne, Losing Grip)

Saturday, August 27, 2005

It doesn't get much better than this

Right now I am sitting at work reading old conference talks and listening to streaming John Schmidt piano music (very quietly, since I work right next to two other people.) I guess this can be considered one of those "warm fuzzy" moments. It's in these times that I usually reflect on my life and realize just how fortunate I am. For example:

1. I am starting nursing school in a week. It's awesome to know that two years of hard work have finally paid off (although there will be two and a half more years of work ahead of me.)

2. I just learned yesterday that I will get to be a religion TA this fall (I will still be working my other job at Dispatch 10 hours a week.) It's going to be great to work with Brother B. I've taken a couple classes from him, and he had once asked me to be a research assistant for him, but it did not fit into my schedule, so I'm glad that I'll get the chance to help him out.

3. I just moved to an awesome complex, and am going to be in an amazing ward. I also have an amazing room mate, who I have known since freshman year, and all my other roommates are wonderful too. This is going to be a great experience.

4. I get to take more dance classes and also audition for the team. I love dancing; it's fun.

5. I have an awesome family that cares about me so much. That's got to be the ultimate warm fuzzy feeling right there.

There's a lot more that I'm very grateful for right now, and I'm not sure that I can put these feelings into words. It's just one of those times when you look around and you realize how grateful you are to be alive and where you are.

Saturday, July 16, 2005

Every new begining comes from some other begining's end...

When I was younger, I always loved the first day of school. It was always a chance for a fresh new start. The funny thing is, when it comes to relationships, I have never really enjoyed the fresh new start. I am going to appreciate it this time. So here I go: I am going to start over, more mature, with more experience, more confidence, and more direction. It's a chance to do many more things right. And, you know, I'm kind of excited to see what happens.

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Ballroom Dance Minor?

Is it even possible to minor in dance while being a nursing major? Would anyone disown me for getting sucked into the bottomless pit of Provo society? Oh well, recent Viennese Waltz and Quickstep experiences have been enough to make me fall in love.

Monday, June 20, 2005

Not quite illegal...

So now that Summer term has started, I think I need to start being more careful about the boys I flirt with. Yes, there are, once again, brand spankin' new freshmen on campus... I don't want this to become a recurring pattern...

Saturday, June 18, 2005

Random stuff that comes to my mind as I sit at work

So last night I crashed Orem Institute dance. It reminded me of how much I love being single. As I think about it, there are two different types of situations that enrich my enjoyment of single life:
1. Having a lot of fun with big groups of people keeps me from wanting to be tied down (for example, last night.) I know someday I'll find someone that will make it worth it for me to give up my freedom. But until then...
2. Going on dates/ hanging out with boys that remind me that I'd rather be single than be with them... sad, I know.
Another thing I noticed about the dance: My blog has the same picture as the signs in the Orem Institute.

Random thought number 2: I think I function better on less sleep. 4 hours a night has been more beneficial to me than the 7 or so I was getting last week.

There are so many other places that I'd rather be than sitting here on a saturday night. I guess someone has to keep BYU campus safe.

Friday, June 17, 2005

Guess who said this!

"you know, I figued, heck, it's been 2 years since I had any action, I might as well go find some more..."

Am I in over my head?

I just found out today that none of my EMTs are going to get paid for events anymore, and this is right before Stadium of Fire where I will need at least fourteen spots covered. Then I find out that I need to schedule/run a training at the stadium before the event. How on earth am I going to get people there for a pre-event training (that can no longer be manditory) if I can't even get them to work at the event? I don't know how I feel about this events coordination assignment anymore.